To Be A Man Of Valor
So, it's been awhile, but we're still here. Don't worry.
I suggested to my friend Michael recently that he should grow a beard. He refused. So I present this list in the hopes he will change his mind:
Top 10 Reasons Michael Chilton Should Grow A Beard
10. It makes you look bad-ass. (Totally.)
9. Saves money on toiletries. (No need to shave.)
8. It keeps your face warm. (Especially important in these winter months.)
7. Why not? (Probably the best argument I've ever heard.)
6.Provide shelter for baby birds. (Or fully-grown birds if your beard is big enough.)
5. It will get you more Myspace friends. (This won't make sense until I tell you that Chilton has over 26,000 Myspace friends. That's a ridiculous number.)
4. Good place to store food. (Also important in the winter months.)
3. Lucrative pirating opportunities. (All pirates have beards.)
2. Wayne Gretzky did it. (Chilton plays hockey.)
1. If Chuck Norris has one, so should you.
Come on, Chilton. Grow a beard.
- The Beardless Yet Incredibly Rugged Scott Clayton
This is your new opinion, thanks to Scott
4 people should've kept to themselves:
however, what you do not know is that mike has over 26 pages of myspace groups, so basically he's taken whore_ing on myspace to a whole new level...
1/08/2006 1:00 PM
11. Depending on your hairstyle, it makes you look like a hippie. And who wouldn't want that?
My mom used to say that people decide to grow beards when they're trying to hide from themselves. But she also tells me to turn down my amp. So I wouldn't worry about that too much.
1/18/2006 9:40 PM
Chilton has a variation on the surfer cut.
Reason number twelve?
12. Purely to defy the wishes of Michael Bleicher's mom.
What now, beotch?
1/18/2006 10:39 PM
fuck chuck. they itch.
2/03/2006 2:04 PM
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