National Kill-Something-And-Wear-It Day

OK! I'm pissed off again. What the hell is with Uggs? You know, those freaking pseudo-boots with that furry stuff inside. First of all, they're not really boots. Boots are thick, brown, steel-toed, kickass pieces of footwear that real men wear when they are demolishing shit or pouring concrete. Secondly, who pays $64.99 for those god-damn things? Why do you need shoes with fur inside? This is not the frickin' Arctic Circle. And why pay companies to make them for you? (Not that I don't fully support Capitolism- It's the American way.) But whatever happened to shooting something for its fur? Too much work? It's not much easier to sit behind a desk for eight hours and shuffle papers around or carry dishes to pissed-off people like myself. Where's the satisfaction? Where's the fun? Contrary to popular belief, it is a lot of fun to shoot stuff. In accordance with such, I hereby declare November 28th to be National Kill-Something-And-Wear-It Day. Everyone should go out and buy a rifle right now. Or swords. Or throwing stars. Whatever works for you.

-The All-Powerful Scott

Wow! Look at the crap you can buy online.

Swords
Stars
UFO Detectors (also makes a great centerpiece)
Laser Guns (I don't like that last one)
Chicken Feet (I think these are like pet products)
Instant Snow (Can't you just freeze water and crush it?)

This stuff is available to the public? Chaos will surely ensue.

Welcome to Angry Penguin from Will

Welcome to the Angry Penguin. This site is designed for Scott and myself to post our opinions on....well, everything. Many of our posts will cause complaints, and if you don't agree with us... we really don't care!

(Please send all complaints to suckmyballs@wedontcare.com)

-The All-Knowing Will

Firefox

My friends, allow me to introduce you to Firefox. It will own your internet. Try it and see the light. It blows my freaking mind.

http://www.mozilla.org/products/firefox/

The Downfall of Music

Rap used to be crap, but now we've got a bigger problem- emo. Tons of depressed teenage girls flocking to concerts where moany, spiky-haired, ripped-jeans-wearing bands with retarted names sing about how their girlfriend left them for a real musician. Now, everyone here should be aware, if not already, that I am a devoted Classic Rock supporter. That is real music. Those songs had meaning that wasn't spelt out in the chorus. Not to mention that all emo "bands" sound alike. Personally, I really don't give a crap about what happens in the lives of these moody, whiney bastards. And who is to blame for this? MTV. I find it funny how they think they're Music Television. They play what makes them money and try to tell you it's cool and hip. And these mindless pop-culture-driven imbeciles beleive it! Emo is not real music, people, and the sooner you realize that, the better.

-The All-Knowing Scott

Welcome to the Angry Penguin

Welcome to the Angry Penguin, an unusual place for unusual ideas. I am Scott and, along with my friend Will, will be entertaining you for as long as we can think of stuff. Please check back soon for updates.